*We began behavior charts, trying to calm down the whiny one (Tater) and impatient one (Bruiser). And I questioned how well Bruiser would understand the process - since he is only 2! Well, Sunday I walked into the kitchen and found him adding stickers to his chart. He had reached up and pulled down the stickers where I had them hanging - supposedly out of his reach! - and decided he had earned stickers all on his own. I asked him why he was putting stickers on the chart and he responded with "I good listener, Momma!" And to top it all off, he was putting the stickers next to the good listener spot!
*Four-year-olds really crack me up! Tater was riding in the car with Daddy on Saturday when all of a sudden she announced, "I'm having a concert in five minutes, Daddy. You had better start singing or you're out!" And what did Daddy do? He started singing!
*Later that day, I told Tater she could go to the grocery store with me if she got dressed. She said to Daddy, "okay, roll over (he was laying on the floor) and I'll scratch your back one time. Then you have to get me dressed." Who needs parents when you have a little mommy!
* Miss Wiggles can be so cute and so bad at the same time! She was cuddling up to me the other night, being super cute!, when all of a sudden she chomped down on my arm! I yelped and told her "NO!" and she promptly burst into tears! She looked so sad that I couldn't possibly stay mad at her!
* Calendars are a good thing until you forget to look at them and double-book yourself! I missed my book club (and well-deserved adult time!) today because I scheduled Bruiser's speech therapy at the same time! Grrrrr!
* We love Tater's new dermatologist! We have lotion (actually more of an oil) that actually stops her itchies and a plan of attack to heal her! If only it hadn't taken so long to get an appointment!
* Everyone says how important it is to get a flu shot but no one tells you how much work it is to actually arrange for them! We have two shots down and four more to go (Miss Wiggles has to get two doses!) - and that's not even counting the H1N1! But the good news was that Bruiser and Miss Wiggles went yesterday and Miss Wiggles' 12 month check-up was scheduled for exactly one month later when she needs her second flu shot - I couldn't have planned it any better!
* The bite of a two-year-old really hurts when its you, but it breaks your heart when his victim his baby sister! Any advise on how to get him to stop? We tried soap in his mouth and he just asked for more!
* There is nothing better at the end of a crazy, stressful day than the hugs and kisses of your little ones!
So funny about the sticker charts!
ReplyDeletethe freaking fours are killing me! We are whiney, demanding and able to debate...they have nothing on the terrible twos!!!
ReplyDeletemy friend does garlic on the tongue instead of soap. cut a garlic clove in half and rub it on their tongue. its non-toxic, but gross! hope that helps!
ReplyDeleteWell, they get hungry and you are a food source. Just kidding, my darling D-I-L.
ReplyDeleteI know this is serious and you are frustrated.
Why do they do these terrible and unacceptable things?
If you can find the motivation. Wowzers, therein is your solution.
Why one child does it and what it will take to make them stop could be totally different for why another one does it and what will work for them.
G Baby may have been trying to show affection and did not realize teeth hurt when she kisses. That could be why she cried when you reacted (which I think was very normally to the pain and shock you were in.) She just has to learn how to give a kiss. Just show her the difference between lips/teeth. No teeth,G!
You already know that being aggressive in return is counterproductive, but someone might suggest that.
What about switching the focus from biter to bitee after an incident? Lavish attention on the bitee (child or grownup) Staying firmly and very seriously upset with the biter that it is unacceptable and will not be tolerated and the consequences thereof. But the attention is not on the biter.
I know you already have them apologize. That is very good.
Teething? When does that start/stop? (Remember I am the non-babybook Mommy). Perhaps lots of appropriate chew toys strewn about? Oh, you already have that for Shadow. Okay, that is a joke, but truly something they can safely bite into. Nearby for those frenzied moments. I don’t know what is out there and safe these days. Teething rings, but those are for babies, not toddlers. And then these attacks come on so suddenly. Everything is fine, then ow! I don’t know how you get them to control it for a few seconds to go and grab a biteon and let them chew away to their hearts content and the incident has subsided.
HEY! Invent a “Biteon” ‘cause I am all about inventions. The child could learn by it’s very being there, attached to their clothing or stroller, at the ever-ready (via a clever clip on device), that if they must bite, choose the Biteon, not someone’s body. Make a $ million. No, the money will not happen. Because one of your savvy Mommy followers is going to read this and get a patent and they will make the money.
“Use your words.” I loved that the first time I heard you say it. Did your mom teach you that? It sounds like her. Could it be frustration that they can’t find their words to display what they want? And they get confused and frustrated?
What else could it be? Let’s revisit the attention getter idea. Logically they should not be craving attention, because they already get that from both of you, but they are toddlers. It is not a GOOD attention getter. So why do they do it?
Think toddler thoughts. Every single one of them would have it 24-7.
But ordinary children these are not. I don’t want to think any of my little sweeties could be cunning... but yours are so brilliant. (Oh yeah everyone. They are). Have they figured out how to make Daddy/Mommy “lose control”? Then feeling they have gained the command seat?
Okay, that idea is a little out there for their ages. They will do that little trick later, in their pre teen years.
But if you 2 would not be so smart, they would be dumber, and I would not even have to think along those lines.
Okay, can’t wait to see what others suggest for you.
I will be praying for help for you to a resolution.
I remember sticker charts. Now we are on to chore charts for allowance at the pre-teen age. It is sorta working - but like the behavior charts - you have to stay behind them or time slips quickly by and nothing is done (or at least with us! ;)
ReplyDelete